did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
make sure you eat your skittles last so when you barf you can barf RAINBOWS.
I'm glad you enjoy my eating disorder so much.
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
He's like a fucking cake pop, the greatest thing in the world while it lasts, but it never lasts for long enough
So this was during drunk golfing. She started wacking me off on the ninth hole and an old couple rolls up next to us. And Says "hey gu- oh my golly" and while my penis is in her hand I'm like "sorry you guys can play through"
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
The UTI came back with a vengeance.
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
Instead of texting me to come over, she just sends me a batman symbol.
I don't care if she's a booty call. Marry her.
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
Randomize
