yeah so this exboyfriend of yours reckons you're still together and he punched me in the face cos i slept with you last week. you might wanna have a word with him or at a minimum change your facebook status.
Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
Yes I was being legit. That's the only plant I want in my house. A growing penis.
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
So last night I taught an old homeless dude to respond to "Blue" so I could shout your my boy Blue at the party
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
You called me into the kitchen so you could show me that you were peeing in the kitchen sink and then told me to leave bc you couldn't do it with me watching
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
You keep making the old jokes & I'm gonna come down with a sudden case of low-estrogen related vaginal dryness..
He ate me out while watching Fifty Shades of Grey---needless to say I'm locking this down
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
Randomize
