OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
So the coke mirror was perfectly angeled at my face right when i woke up this morning. I now know how I'd look on intervention.
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
I traded my shirt for vodka. I wonder if my parents can pinpoint where they went wrong raising me.
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
WHEN THE FUCK DID MCDONALD'S DECIDE TO QUIT SERVING BURGERS AT 1:00AM?
I would peed on everything
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
Why do I have a separate credit card just for booze? Because I saved enough points so Saturday we are flying to Denver to smoke legal weed and fly back in the same day.
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
Randomize
