we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
you woke me up in the middle of the night to tell me you were taking off your pants and it was not an invitation.
In the ER. 2nd degree burns. Drunken attempt to make gasoline scented candles.
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
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