she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
I think I sprained my soul last night
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
So after your set last night some 42 year old woman bought me a drink, professed her love for your music, and then made out with me last night because she thought I was you. Thank you.
And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking.
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
I was stalking his twitter and saw that he used punctuation in a hashtag. Thank god we didn't work out because I can't be with someone that incompetent
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
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