don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
He offered to take me to my appointment after breakfast then kind of just sat there and watched me get a papsmier. Most awkward first date ever.
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
I take it you're alive?
Mostly. Can't quite control my arms.
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
Remember those neighbors I thought were FBI agents? Turns out they're DEA.
Randomize
