bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
I'm in that stage of denial where I hope our kids have his nose.
You do realize that you broke up with him, right?
Just got caught pissing on a plant in her room while she was in the shower first word out of my mouth were my bad
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
sorry I didn't call you. I had your number saved as "girl that offered bj but didn't follow thru".
He made me stop in the middle of giving him a blowjob so he could go get his glasses. because he "wanted to see". I need to stop dating nerds.
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
stalking the twitter feeds of girls who have fucked my current fuck buddy makes me glad we use condoms
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
Randomize
