life lesson #1: a fart during an awkward silence between 2 strangers doesnt make it less awkward.
i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
I just ate a dove chocolate and the wrapper said "chocolate: always your valentine" WHAT KIND OF JACKASS WRITES THESE AND WHY MUST THEY MOCK ME?
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.
I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
The guy I'm talking to drunk texted me his essay last night and he asked me to revise it
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
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