Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
You ever just wake up and decide, today I'm going to eat a whole bag of fritos and a tub of cream cheese
you're usually drunk when you offer. there's one time you called me, told me not to dye my hair red, and asked if i wanted to see your tits.
I feel like there's no sexy way to pull 12 condoms out of your bra.
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
Lexi was drunk enough at 2pm to say "fuck tom brady and fuck you too" to literally every person at the store in Pats attire.
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
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