So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
Let's just have a brief moment of silence for my dignity before we start tonight
You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.
Hey, my drug test is at 4:15 tomorrow. I'll meet you 5 minutes later.
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
what compelled you to fill her bra with pudding and freeze it in the first place?
i might remember if i didn't get knocked out with it later that day.
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
So stoned that I pressed the unlock button on my car keys to walk into my bedroom...
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
Thank you for coming with me today. I find it appropriate that we celebrated my negative pregnancy test with slurpees and donuts.
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