I stood up and a chip flew out of my shirt and landed in the chip dish. I just walked away.
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
we were all standing in the kitchen taking shots and we look over at you and your face is in the plate of spaghetti you were eating.
The cab driver referred to me as his little gumdrop, im sure he won't feel the same when he sees the vomit all over his floor.
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
Idk, you were a drunk pirate that kept stealing pieces of people's costumes to keep as your booty.
That would explain all the random shit in my room...
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
you know you're doing something right when your drug dealer insists on hugging you before you leave.
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
She can't take shots?!? Literally if I could list that as a skill on a resume I would
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
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