love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
Theres a dude at this concert at the urinal double fisting beers, taking drinks from both while simultaneously pissing euerywhere. He is my hero
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
Fair warning birthday party last night avoid kitchen & upstairs bathroom if you value your remaining sanity
Ran into a tinder match at the bar last night. We spotted each other and started making out without speaking any words to each other. Fuck yea technology!
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
Randomize
