how could I be having a bad time, I have the three most important things in life: Goat cheese, Xanax, and Saved By the Bell Re-runs.
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
Randomize
