Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
Unless I'm getting a singing midget telegram, I'm not going to smile
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
I'm drinking Dom Perignon from the bottle with a straw just to piss of some french dude.
I think I just tested my sobriety limits for unicycling.
She's walking around topless with a bottle of red wine, crying and singing showtune ballads. This is actually an improvement.
Just realized I left my heels in their microwave. Whoops.
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
I just want to say that I've always loved you and you are my best friend ever
You gave that creepy guy my number, didn't you? You really need to learn how to just say no, not interested.
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