all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
It's like God was speaking to me through a penis.
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
Apologies for hacking your facebook and posting that picture of you passed out hooked up to the IV...but we were sat with you on the ER floor for 3 hours, it got boring
lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
I didn't have the heart to tell him that the reason my vagina was so "prelubricated" was because I had just had another gentleman caller an hour earlier. So, when he commented about how turned on I appeared, I just went with it.
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
Just convinced a housekeeper at work to set up her 401k. Gotta start hittin the gb every morning before work. Happy 420
When I met you, I was just like "who the fuck is this drunk chick throwing up on my bed?" But I'm glad we're friends now
My house exploded and with it all my pot went up in smoke.
Randomize
