you can't spend the night you always smell like dirty underwear and my roommates complain
Just got a citation from campus security for an "accordion disturbance."
the toilet has never flushed louder then when you sneak home drunk and try to avoid your parents hearing you puke.
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
Literally been drinking for 10 hours. Hammered. Roasted chestnuts fell out of my shirt earlier.
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
I walked from the hotel to the club with a pint of tequila in my boot. Poured some in a homeless woman's mouth when she asked for change. I've hit rock bottom.
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
... Cuz there's nothing like having your two male roommates catching you have a good cry in the driveway at 9am on a Wednesday.
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Randomize
