So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
note to self: Never ask your girlfriend to have a 3some with your ex...
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
I just need to go to a bar tonight wrapped in an American flag singing the national anthem
she's like the billy mays of hookups...touch my boobs and i'll throw in this blow job ABSOLUTELY FREE
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
He was like "why do you look so cute today?" and I said "I showered" and he laughed. I wasn't making a joke
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
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