I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
it's too hot outside to masturbate.
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
best thing about halloween? there are pumpkins to puke in EVERYWHERE!
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
In Berlin they just cured HIV with stem cells. I am hereby fucking anything that moves.
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
Dude, putting on underwear straight out of the dryer is the greatest thing ever. It feels like I wrapped my vagina in a warm blanket.
Yeah so then I used the selfie stick his mom gave me to take nudes
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
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