after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
I just farted for five sidewalk sections! New personal best.
two words: eviction party
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
When I go out tonight I need to make sure to be really good. The Easter bunny doesn't deliver to jail
Those nachos came to me in a dream
My debit card was between my ass cheeks when i woke up. i vaguely remember putting it there for safe keeping
Randomize
