Just left a map of the Aleutian islands on this Eskimo girls face. Check one off my Alaska to do list.
this boner is exhausting
just customized my debit card w a pic of me ralphing over the toilet. figure it'll give the bar keep a good cut off est and for shits n giggles when buying my handles at the liqour store
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
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