the fundamentals of my vasectemy are strong
i literally in my bathroom watching tv from across the hall while trying not to fall asleep with my dog keeping my feet warm. wednesday's shouldnt be like this
I Just paid off the bartender to help me convince this chic my roommate's gay. This is the best cockblock ever.
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.
Saved a life and got us a free vacuum cleaner (and learned vacuum is not spelled "vacumn"). Get on my level.
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
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