all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
Woke up chewing my pillow from a dream where I was scarfing Cajun pasta from TGI Friday's. That's a new level of fat, even for us
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
So I come back home and a huge flock of enormous vultures are on my roof
They're waiting for you to die
Next time she asks for a ride to her "cousins" house and it turns out to be a booty call we're charging her for each mile.
I can't finger myself when I'm all distracted about whether or not your family is going to like me
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
DONT YOU DARE YELL AT ME. YOU'RE THE ONE WHO TRIED TO PAY FOR THE CAB WITH YOUR PANERA REWARDS CARD.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
Randomize
