just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
85% positive I just found a hair of a certain variety wayyy in the back of my mouth between two teeth while flossing.
btw i have an angry voicemail of you yelling at me to get you a sandwich or die.
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
I started the day with dreams of getting laid and ended it with the reality of eating Taco Bell in my bed with my dog.
the gnome is staring at me and the pineapple is wearing shorts. I don't want to do this anymore.
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
Randomize
