I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
Taking shots of gin by myself out of TMNT glasses and chasing with bites of chocolate cake. AMERICA.
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
He just showed up with a bottle of wild turkey a half a can of coke and some marshmallows yelling "gobble gobble bitches" my roommates hate my cousin
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
then looked at this little girl next to me and was like "don't drink when you get older and don't let your best friend be with assholes." she looked at me like i was crazy
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
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