? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
I just saw an old lady yelling at a dead pigeon for leaving the oven on.
I just called my cat a slut and she responded. Proudest moment ever.
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
There is a midget driving a powered tricycle around town. I am not drunk, stoned, or lying.
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
You showed up at my front door in a bikini with a fifth of tequila it was like the opening to a porno
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
I watched my wife kick balloons while wearing thigh highs. It's not a sentence you get to use too often
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