yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
I just masturbated at work. Does that make me a prostitute since i just technically got paid to have sex?
we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
Please talk me out of ordering the stripper pole for a dollar. Please.
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
Don't act like you're not jealous that I disappeared into the closet to blow my husband. Marriage = all the cock I want.
When you pick me up at the airport, please have some sort of drugs on hand.
Ah, drunk me ordered sushi at 3 a.m. for sober me's lunch the next day. EXCELLENT
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
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