You don't get off work for this? I feel genuinely bad for you.
I'll have a beer when I get into the office. Yes, I hide beer in my work frige.
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
I've carried my liver for over 24 years. If it can't carry me for the next 24 hours than it deserves to be damaged.
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
Tornado booty call.. dedication
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
Drive by water balloon fight on $500,000 boats ended when someone threw a dildo
I'm shotgunning a 12 pack at a bus stop. This is why we pay the rent with an auto withdrawal at the beginning of the month
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
Randomize
