I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
Just accidentally pinched my dick between two 50 pound dumbbells while doing shoulder shrugs. God hates me.
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
Let me get this straight. You stopped mid foreplay to shave your legs?
Um yeah. I wasn't about to shave them if nothing was happening. And I have HBO. It's not like he's the victim here.
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize
