I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
I just saw the Donald Trump of homeless quys walking down the street. He had three shopping carts and a bike.
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
Just got attacked by a family of raccoons, I have the worst luck.
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
SERIOUSLY WHY DOES EVERYONE INSIST THAT THEY NEED TO SEE MY BOOBS
Because there's a shortage of perfect breasts in this world. You should start charging for viewings.
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
my underwear is inside out , I have a giant hickie. I'm wearing last nights makeup. this is going to be the best day at work ever
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
Randomize
