please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
I have no idea where I am, where my pants are, there is cheese stuck to my ass.. Why do I have your phone?
shot for shot with some guy twice your age to prove Detroit hustles harder then you left with him. We're tracking you
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
Who the fuck did i sell my right shoe to last night i need to get that back im not walking with one shoe on
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
Hey the moment you step into my house, find me IMMEDIATELY so we can pinky promise on not roping anyone at the party into yet another threesome
Randomize
