Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
you cant ever make fun of my bong's stick on moustache again. its the reason the cop let me keep it and my weed.
I'm not saying I haven't been that drunk. I'm just saying I haven't been that drunk and then have cops buy me shots.
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
Just opened up the freezer to find chocolate penis popsicles. Too hungover for this shit
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
the dude in the apartments across the street got a video of me railing blake on your front steps last night
shit like this is why i dont let you drink vodka anymore ..
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
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