When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
the number of months ive had a girlfriend in my life divided by the number of blowjobs ive gotten is extremely depressing...
You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
Fun fact. I am at the police dept. getting served a warrant for unpaid ordinance... and the officer was a one night stand from like 10 years ago.
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
The cat hopped on my bed and watched me masturbate naked with a vibrator. I've never felt more sorry in my entire life
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