yeah for some reason your penis didn't fit in my mouth the other day
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
What if our hands were octopus tentacles?
You're an idiot.
He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing...
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
I can't have the last guy who touched my vagina be my coworker.
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
Let me set the mood for you. Do you remember Britney Spears in her Hit Me Baby One More Time era? Well I just fucked this college girl I shit you not her name is Persephone and she looks exactly like Britney Spears back when she was hot. I might be in love.
Randomize
