Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
Her handjob consisted of slapping me in the balls. I am never hooking up with her ever again ever.
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
Randomize
