Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
I told her the maid must have stolen all my condoms. She bought it
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
you know you’re single when you try to cook yourself a nice pasta dinner but you’re too weak to open the container of sauce and theres no one around to help you
I'M NOT EVEN STOPPING FOR WINE SO I CAN GET TO THAT DICK QUICKER.
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