drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
just got waxed at a place I havent been to in a while
woman didnt remember me then in the middle of waxing she announced that she just didnt recognize my face
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
What's a nice way of saying 'I wish I hadn't fucked you.'
Randomize
