did I really admit that id have sex with that cougar had I been more drunk?...ugh...i need to masterbate more
Whose surfboard did we steal and why is there a wood carving of a pelican in the fridge where the beer used to be?
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
I should start wearing my Batman shirt more often when I drink. Good things happen. All sorts of shit.
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
Randomize