THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you
girlfriend?
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
Please don't ever try giving my cat a hair cut ever ever again
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
Its weird to introduce me to his wife and kids on the first date, right?
Randomize
