how are you not completely traumatized after 8 years of friendship with me?
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
If I started a story with "That three-year-old totally deserved it," would you listen?
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
Randomize