Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
We had to use the stains on Phil's shirt to try to piece together what happened last night.
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
You sent me a cat video and you screaming drunkenly in my background
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
You followed me up the stairs while i was throwing up yelling "projectile! projectile! projectile!"
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
Randomize
