WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
you were stumbling around in your attic looking for all your swim team medals because you wanted to "feel like a champion."
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
PS- I just stirred my mimosa with a slice of bacon
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
People around me are just doing lines of cocaine. Like its no big deal. And I'm just here like.... Y'all want some cheezits?
OPIZZABONMYDICK
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
Omg I'm having dinner at chilli's with a guy who is arguing that getting a weed leaf tatoo on his neck will prevent him from getting a job as a dental assistant
Well that actually sounds reasonable
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
Tell me you're alive little brother. And please tell me you didn't get arrested. You made no fucking sense last night in your random texts and pictures you were sending me.
Randomize