is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
He can only pee with the faucet running. It's like I'm dating a fucking toddler.
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
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