what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
woke up on my stairs with half a hot dog beside me and the last text I sent was "i make hot dog in toasTer" .
Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
She asked what it would take for you to fuck her. You drunkenly mumbled, "pepperoni pizza" and then got in the cab by yourself. You were smiling too. It was weird.
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
The girl who comes up after me always strips to Lana Del Rey. I didn't think working in a strip club could be any more depressing.
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
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