Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
Dude you asked your tattoo if it wanted to go swimming
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
Ran out of deodorant. Febreze on a paper towel? Kicking college's ass.
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
I’m drunk and naked and looking for my charger - title of my autobiography.
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
Randomize
