I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
The sun is gonna brush it's hairy dick across my forehead in the morning, gently whispering: "you're 4 hours late for work"
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
you're good to come back. The bouncer pulled me aside and told me. He also said you have nothing to worry about and that you have an awesome "upper punch" or some shit
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown
all I'm saying is if you're gonna fuck a fat chick do it in a pool it's like zero gravity or something
how did you graduate high school
Fun Fact: I do not remember what its like to be sober between drinking off and on for two weeks at my "vacation" and being on painkillers for my mouth now
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
Updates: Made out with a teletubby last night in the middle of the street #lifegoals
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