The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
dude. i just ate tomato soup with a funnel. we're out of spoon-straws.
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
What??! Dude I'm not having you barging in at like 2 am smelling of cigarettes and disappointment to sleep on my couch and then have an awkward morning with my wife while I'm at work.
Touché sir
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
Randomize
