we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
Thanks for convincing the hot dog guy to give me one for $1 after I drunkenly dropped the first one. I loved your reasoning "I know you mark that shit up! I work in retail!"
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
Just found a wrench in the washing machine. Sooo not doing your laundry anymore.
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
Thank you for deleting me from Instagram. Also, I'm carrying your child. Happy new year!
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
If you get me a sex toy for Christmas everyone in my family will question our relationship.
I'm too depressed to masturbate. This election is the worst.
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
Randomize
