so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
sick fucks of a feather flock together
Im calling him
was mistake calling. If you drunk dial someone you deserve to choke on a tubesock. Take the advice. Always remember
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
Randomize
