Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
dude, mark had the least successful cab ride in history last night. took a cab to the bars, stopped at every atm in the city, none worked, then had to come back to the party to beg for 20 to pay the taxi that officially took him nowhere.
You didn't have enough money so you tried to convince the cashier that "four dollar foot long" rolled off the tongue better. Stop drinking. Immediately.
My one night stand found me at the library and randomly gave me plan B. He was scared I was going to get pregnant because he has a very high sperm count.
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
I told a 250 pound football player I would catch him if he jumped into my arms. And that is how I broke my wrist
YOU GAVE HIM A BLOWJOB ON YOUR DOORSTEP?!
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
Sorry, It's like OkCupid Olympics... categories: best sext, best dick pic, and most effort by ugly. You won gold in the last event if that makes you feel better.
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
Randomize
