and then I told her I was too drunk. She started to cry, and told me this always happens to her and that she thinks shes ugly. I pretended I was asleep and then she farted.
a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
They thought "watering it down" meant adding more vodka
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
You're the common denominator of my blackouts.
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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